Dignity (The Lesser-Spotted Kind)

Recently I have been losing my dignity to "random" beeps. As soon as it sounds, I hang my head, for it means that I must be frisked - the shoes-off kind of frisk that you expect a kiss afterwards. In a new policy it is no longer down to the AVIATION SECURITY to select a person for the random search. The metal detector will beep, at random, requiring the member of AVIATION SECURITY to jump up from the chair he is lounging on and put his hands over your body and soul. The beep has selected me every time so far and, as I remove my shoes, I weep a little inside.

I only mention this removal of dignity because the insidious nature of the airport seems to have increased of late. With Easter there came not only increased passengers, but also a new commander in chief and a new deputy. These people give incompetence a new definition, but that's not the worst aspect of their reign - we're back in the territory of Fictional Authority, Notes and humiliation. All of the things I have been lamenting for the last few years have been embodied by these two interlopers.

But fear not, who needs dignity when they belong to the human race. Only this very day I have seen:

1. A man running towards the toilet, his hand cupped under his chin. Out of his nose and mouth poured a viscous liquid that looked like yellow snot. It had that foamy translucence that indicates some kind of mucus. But there was so much of it. As he ran, he caught the stream in his cupped hand, splashing remnants of this sick-snot all over the floor. His lack of dignity was caused by his own body. Christ, it was scary...

2. A man in the toilets speaking on his mobile phone. I finished washing my hands and selected the hand dryer next to wear he was standing (on purpose of course, I am not accidentally cruel). The roar commenced and he was forced to admit to his interlocutor that he was indeed in a toilet.
"Hang on," he said. "I'm leaving the toilet now." All very well, but he had yet to pack away, and zip up. He entered the public with his belt flapping, still talking on the phone. His own idiocy had removed his dignity.

3. A woman, changing her baby in the facilities supplied by the airport. The baby was crying, the woman simply yelled, "SHUT UP, SHUT UP, SHUT UP," over and over again. Her dignity was removed by her own vicious streak.

I could go on, but I'm still thinking about the man with the weird snot problem. I feel sick...